Get Your Kink On | Life of a Lovense-Enabled Sex Furniture Artisan


Last Updated on: 21st October 2023, 02:56 am

So, you freaky little voyeurs, I’m going to let you in on a juicy secret. Not many people know this, but I – your girl Daria – am a sex furniture artisan. That’s right, I make Lovense-enabled, P and V-integrated pleasure machines. Quality shit, right?

With my luck in the CNC department being less than stellar lately, I figured it was time to get back to what I do best: crafting my sexy creations. ‘Cause, y’know, a girl’s gotta have a hobby.

I’m aiming to get INM API integrated, but those bureaucratic bastards are taking their sweet time getting back to me with the license. But, no worries. I built my latest masterpiece: a new, ultra-cool love bed that’ll rock your world.

So, there you have it, the not-so-secret-anymore talents of your fave kink queen. When life gives you lemons, make some badass, Lovense-enabled sex furniture.

Building furniture is an absolute blast, and I fucking love it. Seriously, what’s not to love about creating a sexy playground with texture themes after importing a sleek Blender file? It’s pure joy, my friends. Now, the animations… that’s a different story. See, as a proud owner of a non-cock, lining up those pesky animations can be a struggle. You’d think there’d be a line of eager dudes ready to volunteer their junk for the noble cause of virtual sex furniture alignment. But oh, how wrong you’d be.

Once these brave souls realize they’re just gonna lie there like lifeless mannequins while they’re dragged into position, their enthusiasm evaporates quicker than you can say “Yolo.” I guess the fantasy of being an erotic furniture test dummy isn’t quite as alluring as it sounds, huh?

Crafting Quality Sex Furniture & A Dose of Lovense Magic

Daria’s Designer Dilemma | Full Perm Fairs, Texture Bonanza, and That One Bed

So, this month’s been packed with full perm fairs, which, for a furniture-making gal like me, is like Christmas came early. All those delicious new textures on sale – yum! Don’t get me wrong, I could whip up my own textures if I felt like it, but when you’re a solo creator juggling building, designing, aligning, scripting, and all that jazz, ain’t nobody got time for that. I’ve been wandering around the full perm events like a kid in a candy store, snatching up all the goodies I can get my greedy little hands on.

Now, there’s this one bed – oh, this bed. I don’t buy furniture to use because I’d rather build and import my own creations, maybe using a guide or taking inspiration from somewhere. But this bed, you guys, it’s freakin’ gorgeous. I want it so badly but I can’t design it or build it myself. It’s just too intricate for my skill set.

And then I saw the price. Holy shit, I nearly had a heart attack right there in the event. Thanks, but no thanks.

So, that’s what I’ve been up to when I’m not on my never-ending quest for quality CNC action. Now, let’s see what other kinky adventures I’ve been up to.

Daria’s CNC Quest Continues | Dodging Lag Fests, Primmy Dudes, and Less-than-Impressive Encounters

Alright, kink enthusiasts, let’s put my creative hobby aside for a moment and get back to the good stuff: my quest for some primo CNC action.

I decided to give Rape Slut another shot after stopping by Nilles first and then Dark Alley. Big mistake. It was a lag fest filled in both with primmy-looking dudes who seemed to have time-travelled straight from the early 2000s. No thanks.

So I arrived at RS and within minutes, I got an IM. This guy said he’d read my profile and wanted to compliment my look without being a total snoozefest. We chatted a bit, and I asked him why he was even there if he wasn’t planning on using the sim for its intended purpose. I.E why was he talking about my hair instead of raping me?

His response? “I’m nice, but I can be not nice sometimes.” Uh-huh, sure thing, buddy. When I asked why he hadn’t taken advantage of my relay and pinned me to a bed or a wall, he gave me an honest answer: “You’re the first person that would probably shit on my looks.”

Well, he wasn’t wrong. The dude was mesh, but it was some bargain-bin, low-quality mesh. Look, I take the time to look good, so I expect the same from my playmates. It’s only fair, right?

So, once again, my quest for CNC ended in disappointment. But don’t worry my fellow pervs, I’m not giving up that easily. Onward!

Daria’s Disillusionment | When CNC Fantasies Meet Second Life Reality

So, I gotta be honest here, my kinky comrades. When I first signed up to write for this blog, I had a metric fuckton of ideas. I thought I’d be drowning in CNC experiences, snapping pics left and right, and building a blog post extravaganza that would leave even Jess green with envy.

Well, turns out, not so much. I just wanna spin some entertaining yarns, but when these Second Life dudes can’t even muster the basic competence to FUCKING GRAB ME, it’s kind of a struggle, you feel me? Seriously, though. I imagined my first post would be jam-packed with steamy CNC tales, and by the time I got around to writing this second post, I’d be sifting through a treasure trove of stories, cherry-picking only the cream of the crop.

But what gives, people? Why is it so hard to find some actual, no-bullshit CNC action in these so-called dedicated sims? Are there just a bunch of posers hanging around, pretending to be into it but not actually having the balls to dive in? Who knows.

So, I had a little chat with myself, and it went something like this: “Daria, you’ve gotta keep trying Rape Slut. If you can’t find a way to satisfy your CNC cravings there, then there’s no hope for humanity.” Or something along those lines. So, back I went, determined to find what I was looking for.

The first guy who IM’d me? Yeah, it was the same dude from the day before. Apparently, I had made him so self-conscious about his appearance that he went and got a complete makeover and a new AO. Good on him, now he was at least semi-fuckable. The question remained, though: could he actually step up and deliver some forced fun?

Nope. Instead, he just wanted to chat about how a friend helped him with his makeover, and blah blah blah. Honestly, I zoned out after a while. He was boring the absolute shit out of me. Then he ventured down a path I wanted nothing to do with—a path that leads only to destruction.

He sent me this super sweet IM, asking if it was okay to add me as a friend, or if there was something he had to do first. That’s when it clicked for me: this guy wasn’t here for CNC; he was submissive. He didn’t know any other sims to hang out in, and this was just where he spent his time.

Seriously? Out of all the places to casually chill, this one wouldn’t be my first pick. But hey, to each their own, I guess. Now, I’m usually a bitch who doesn’t give a damn about what I say or who I upset—life’s too short for that. But suddenly, I felt a twinge of guilt for being mean to this guy. What the actual fuck was wrong with me?

Lovense-Enabled Sex Furniture Artisan

Daria’s Desperation | A Series of Misadventures in the Quest for CNC Satisfaction

So there I was, dragging myself back to that godforsaken place. I’m clearly a glutton for punishment. I barely set foot in there when some dude hits me up with, “Hey, Babe.” Ugh. First off, don’t call me “babe”—you don’t know me, we have zero connection, and pet names are not okay. After that, he said my dress looked amazing on me, but he’d look even better. Idiot.

Let’s dissect this trainwreck. Number 1: I wasn’t even wearing a freaking dress. Number 2: That pick-up line was an abomination. Number 3: I don’t want pick-up lines, I want some action! Number 4: His appearance was just tragic, mesh, but the worst quality mesh you can imagine.

I straight-up told him it wasn’t happening, so he tried to grab my collar to capture me. My collar isn’t set for capture; it’s set for relay only. He could have captured me using furniture, but nooo, he tried to grab my leash. He attempted this sad charade five times before finally vanishing. Good riddance.

Not that I would have let him do anything, anyway. Did I get close to experiencing some CNC? Not a chance in hell. He was just butthurt that I shot down his pathetic attempt at getting me naked. Even if he had managed to grab my collar, I doubt he would have known what to do with it.

There were so many things wrong with that interaction that it would have been anything but fun for me. So, the quest continues, I guess. Somebody save me from these losers.

Lovense-Enabled Sex Furniture Artisan

Daria’s Nille’s Nightmare A Lousy Lag-Fest and a Lesson in Pickup Line Etiquette

There I was, trying my luck at Nille’s Hangout—a lag-infested cesspool, but who knows? Maybe I’d find a diamond in the rough. And if you thought I was exaggerating about the lag, I’m not. It was like walking through a swamp with ankle weights. But hey, I’m a masochist, remember?

So, just as I was landing, some eager beaver sent me a “wanna fuck?” message. Can you believe it? Like, dude, I haven’t even rezzed yet! At least give me a minute to materialize before you shove your sad pick-up lines in my face. It’s a CNC sim, for crying out loud. It’s not like you need to put on a Shakespearean performance. Just grab me and let’s get this show on the road. But no, we can’t have that now, can we?

I told the guy no, which I guess was too much for his delicate ego because he went MIA faster than a chocolate bar at fat camp. At least he didn’t try to grab my collar like that bargain-bin Ken doll from before. Seriously, folks, get a grip on the concept here.

Now, I didn’t come all this way just to have my time wasted, so I started exploring the sim. I found this room that looked like a medieval torture chamber and a modern dungeon had a baby. The creativity was off the charts, but you know what wasn’t? The people. Brains as empty as a politician’s promise.

Then, as I wandered further, I stumbled upon a group of newbies trying to tie each other up. It was like watching a bunch of monkeys trying to put together IKEA furniture. One even managed to tie themselves up instead of their “victim.” I laughed so hard, I nearly fell off my chair. If only they’d put in the effort to learn the ropes—pun intended—instead of fumbling around like a bunch of clueless idiots.

So, there you have it. Nille’s Hangout was just another bust in my never-ending quest for some genuine CNC action. What’s a girl gotta do to get some proper kink around here? But don’t worry, dear readers, I’m not giving up yet. The search continues.

Lovense-Enabled Sex Furniture Artisan

From Zero to Hero | How a Chance Encounter Turned My Furniture Biz Around

Alright, my virtual vixens, it’s time for a change of pace in this part my Second Life shenanigans. Turns out, I’m not just a sex-crazed, sarcastic mess – I’ve actually got business skills. Who knew, right?

So, fed up with the lack of CNC action in my life (I know, tragic), I decided to focus on what I’m good at: crafting furniture. There’d been some buzz about partnering with the X-Sisters to sell my sexy creations in their store, but nothing had come to fruition yet. So, off I went to their bar, hoping for a stroke of luck.

And would you believe it, I bumped into this chick named Chandra. Now, she was the kinda girl I’d usually wanna punch in the face – all outgoing, happy, and chirpy. Ugh. But surprisingly, Chandra was actually cool. We got to talking, and I showed her some of my furniture. One thing led to another, and I mentioned how I was looking for investors to up the ante on my PleasureScape biz.

Out of nowhere, Chandra started asking about logistics and finances. I know, right? A serious adult conversation in Second Life? What is this madness? But, lo and behold, Chandra ended up buying a 15% stake in PleasureScape. Bam! Just like that, I had a business partner.

Our first order of business? To create a bed with FF animations and get it on sale, stat. With Chandra’s help, we lined up the poses, and voilà – our masterpiece was complete and ready to hit the virtual shelves.

It’s amazing how chance encounters can change everything. Meeting Chandra gave my business the extra oomph it needed, and now the sky’s the limit for PleasureScape and the kinky furniture we can make.

So, here’s to new beginnings and finding success in the most unexpected places. Who knows what’s next for this dynamic duo? Stay tuned, my virtual voyeurs – it’s bound to be one hell of a ride.

Catch ya on the flip side,

Daria xoxo

Subscribe to get all the latest posts straight to your email!

1 Comment

  1. Chandra Kusari

    Thankies for not punching my face … I prefer it unpunched.

    It was funs watching you work and help a bit on the way. Love your craft girl!

    I hope I don’t ruin your gloomy outlook on life, but our chat was inspiring. I am gonna try and find new outlets for my creativity.

Leave a Reply

This is NOT a backlink farm comment section.
I'm glad you chose to leave a comment. Please note that any links to unrelated websites will be deleted and marked as spam. Keep the links relevant to Second Life or the post content.