The Cum Detective: A Sticky Mystery At Candy’s

Last Updated on: 11th January 2026, 09:14 am

I don’t really know what a “Cum Detector” is, but it sounds like a job title I was born for.

The investigation started this morning. I woke up, stretched, and realized something terrible: someone had left a fresh, sticky white patch on my sheets. Since I sleep alone (mostly) and I definitely didn’t put it there, I have a mystery on my hands.

I need to work out who the culprit is. Naturally, I did what any rational girl would do. I bought a deerstalker hat like Sherlock Holmes, a wooden pipe, and a magnifying glass. I am now Sasha, The Cum Detective.

Although, “Cum Detector” sounds like I’m a device used to locate the cum, not the source of it. Considering how often I end up covered in it, maybe I am the device?

Jess runs the number one Second Life sex site, so you’d think she would give me a budget for a private investigator, but no. I have to solve this crime myself.

The Investigation Begins

While everybody else gets the fun adventures like having sex in a church or getting gang-banged, I’m stuck here playing CSI: Bedroom.

I stared at the stain through my magnifying glass. No leads. I needed to go to the source. I needed to go to a place where the supply of semen is effectively infinite.

I decided to start my investigation at the hotel.

Why?

Because Candy’s All-Inclusive Sex Hotel is basically the headquarters of bad decisions. If you are looking for the best sex sims in SL, Candy’s was always top of the list for sheer volume of bodily fluids.

If the culprit was anywhere, he was probably at the bar, waiting for a refill.

Suspect No. 1: Mr. Uwe

When I arrived, I didn’t find the suspect, but I did find Mr. Uwe. I haven’t seen him since the time he gave me a tour with Sternchen, so it was good to see a familiar face.

However, Mr. Uwe wasn’t interested in my investigation. He was interested in me, but he had critiques. He looked me up and down, frowned, and told me he didn’t like my ink. Apparently, the tattoos were “too much.” Then he looked at my chest and told me my boobs weren’t small enough.

Now, I am a trainee. I need to impress the clients. I need the tips. So, like a good little slut, I didn’t argue. I went into my mesh body settings, hid the tattoos, and dialled the chest sliders down until I fit his specific, picky aesthetic.

He seemed to approve of the “New Sasha.” His frown turned into a dark grin, and he asked if he could fuck me right there on top of the bar.

I wasn’t going to say no. By this time, the magnifying glass was back in my inventory and I had completely forgotten that I was supposed to be a detective. I was just horny.

The Scene of the Crime

He lifted me onto the cold, hard surface of the bar counter. We had an audience, which always makes me wetter. Lumi and Brooke were standing nearby, chatting near the plants, unaware that they were now in the splash zone.

Mr. Uwe didn’t waste time. He pushed my legs back over my head and slid his thick cock deep inside me. It was a tight fit, filling me up completely and hitting that spot that makes my brain shut off.

My body slammed rhythmically against the bar top with every thrust. Smack. Smack. Smack. I could feel the vibration of it through my spine. It reminded me of when I use my toys, if you haven’t read our Lovense guide, you really need to, because the sensation of being filled like that is addictive.

He was relentless, pounding into me with a possessive energy that made me forget my own name. I knew he was going to cum soon, and I wanted to go with him. I reached down, my fingers finding my swollen clit, and started rubbing in time with his thrusts.

The pressure built fast. Too fast. “I’m close,” I gasped, my head falling back.

He gave one final, brutal shove, and I erupted. I squirted hard, a massive wave of fluid that arched over the bar and sprayed directly across the room.

I soaked Lumi.

I’m pretty sure I hit Brooke too. They both shrieked and ran to hide behind the potted plants, wiping their faces, but I was too lost in the orgasm to care. Mr. Uwe groaned, twitching inside me as he filled me with his own warm load, mixing his mess with mine.

Case Unsolved

By the time we had finished and I peeled myself off the sticky bar top, everybody had left. Maybe I was too loud. Maybe they didn’t appreciate the impromptu shower.

Whatever their reason was, I know that I had fun.

I walked out of the hotel and realized I had completely forgotten my job. The mystery of the cum stain on my bed remains unsolved. But honestly? After Mr. Uwe was done with me, I had plenty of new stains to worry about.

The pipe and magnifying glass are going back into storage. Sasha the Cum Detector is retiring. I think I’ll stick to being a whore. It pays better.

Want to help me investigate next time? Come and visit me! (Since this post was written, I now work at X-Sisters and not Candy’s) I promise I (probably) won’t squirt on you.

[Teleport to The X-Sisters Sex Bar]